Archive for Blood

St. Valentines Day, The Day of Self-Hatred.

Posted in Entertainment with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 14, 2013 by urbannight

dead-cupid

Today is the worst holiday of the year. It is the day that was created to sell more greeting cards. It is a day to celebrate things that do not last. Candy, Flowers, Beauty, Lust, Infatuation, Flirtation.

It screams at people, saying that if you are not half of a pair then you are a sad, pathetic loser and you better keep out of sight on this day of red and pink and white.

Red for blood. Pink for flesh. White for the sheet to cover the body.

I declare it open season on cupid. Stop that little bastard in his tracks.

Red is for Rage

Posted in Work with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 17, 2012 by urbannight

Double Double Toil and Trouble

Fire Burn and Cauldron Bubble

 

Everyone is familiar with the witch’s scene in Macbeth.  At least I like to think everyone knows it.  If they don’t, I feel it is a failure of the educational system.  But that just is not fair.  Students have to take ownership of their own education. 

 

Not that Edumacation (error on purpose) has anything to do with where I am going.

 

I’m thinking more along the lines of anger and rage.  When the blood boils and the skin feels on fire and you feel like one wrong thing said to you with send you right over the deep end into trouble which often leads to a lot of toil to either repair the damage or to get past it and go on with life, in a new direction.

 

I was so angry that I worked through my lunch break.  I was so angry that I was afraid if I left my desk I might just take my purse and keep walking until I got to the mystery book store to wait for my roommate to pick me up.  I was so angry that I was starting to see a red border pulsing at the edge of my vision. 

 

Okay, not really, not in the sense I was seeing a real optical illusion.  I’m not going totally mental or having a physiological problem triggered by rage.  It is an allusion to gaming.  When you have a map pop-up open, or a character sheet or anything that covers most of your play area, and you get attacked the edges will start to pulse red in a lot of games.  Sometimes the overlay itself will turn from blue to red. 

 

Double Double Toil and Trouble

Fire Burn and Cauldron Bubble

 

In a round about way, without knowing dollar figures, I have figured out I’m the lowest paid person on my unit.  And they will be filling two new openings at a higher pay grade than me.  Clerical staff was told that we were going to be reassigned to the appropriate job titles but our pay grades were not going to be changed to reflect the correct pay grade for the job title.  For many people, they have been here a long time and are already above the relevant pay grade.  But I am at a level below what my job is going to become.  And my pay is going to stay at the level below. 

 

This means that everyone, including the new people, will be at a higher rate than me.  Yet I’m the only one who was doing this job prior to this unit being created and I’m the one they always come to when they have problems.  And the claims that no one can figure out get sent to me to set up.  In the yearly evaluation session with the supervisor, she stopped herself when she very nearly said that I could have run this unit. 

 

One of my reasons for rage should be clear, as I have to submit an application for my own job, just so I can move up a pay grade.