Archive for Heart Burn

No melons were injured in the writing of this blog . . . but I did eat some pineapple.

Posted in Cooking, Food, Health with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 24, 2014 by urbannight

I’ve identified a few heart burn triggers and so I was reading an article about foods that cause heart burn and what to avoid.  It was a very bad list.  It was far to general.  Or advising a fairly brutal diet only a serious vegan might like.  Aside from the fish.

1. Don’t eat grains.  Well there goes an entire food group.  Handy for people who need to be gluten-free but it cuts out gluten-free grains.  I suppose it might make Paleo people happy.  But not for long……

2. Avoid acidic foods.  Sounds good.  But all items listed here were listed in other sections as well.  So I won’t bother with the actual list.

3.  Don’t eat sweets or candy or desserts.  Well, most of these contain grains, or acidic ingredients.  So that kinda makes sense.

4. Don’t drink drinks.  Beer, alcohol, wine, coffee, caffeinated drinks, carbonated drinks, fizzy drinks, most juices.  That pretty much leaves water and herbal tea.  This section was much longer but everything falls under that list.  They could have saved space by saying only drink water and herbal tea but stay away from peppermint.

5. Dairy.  Again, it is easier to say that butter seems to be okay and some cheeses.  But they didn’t say which cheese was bad so I can’t guess which cheese is good.  Everything else is bad.  By the way, this is the second food group that is pretty much decimated.

6.  Greasy meals. No oily food, no fatty food.   It went on to explain that fast food and snack foods are greasy and for some reason made a point of condemning spicy Ketchup specifically.  Which should probably go in the next section.

7. No spicy food.  Spices apparently trigger heart burn.  But is it spices or is it really peppers and chilies?

8.  Avoid fruit.  Well, there is another entire food group.  It covered berries, citrus, and a number of other fruit.  Plums were not mentioned, nor some of the exotic fruits, and no melons were mentioned.  So I guess melons and plums are now the entire fruit section.

9. No protein.  Um, huh?  Well, there go the Paleo people.  Okay, if you must have it you can have fowl but no eggs.  Nothing was said about shellfish.  I don’t really include those with fish but maybe they did.  Oh, and the fourth food group is significantly reduced.

10.  And some veggies are bad.  Mostly in the onion/garlic family.  And sauerkraut.  But sauerkraut is a dish, not a veggie.  Either cabbage isn’t so great or it’s the stuff it is cooked in.


In the end, my ultimate impression is:

Veggies, mostly good, avoid cabbage and anything in the onion/garlic group.

Fruit Bad, Melons good.  Plums probably okay.  No berries.

Meat Bad, Birds Good.

Dairy Bad, Butter Good, some Cheese is okay but we don’t know which kinds so better stay away.

Grains Bad.

The Heartburn Friendly Food Pyramid:


F  O  W  L

M  E  L  O  N  S

V  E  G  E  T  A  B  L  E  S


Death by Pizza

Posted in Food with tags , , , , , , , , , on May 1, 2012 by urbannight

I went to bed feeling less than good. Chewable antacid didn’t work. I woke up in hell.

I love these!

They hate me.

I woke up feeling like I might die, so I had to go buy this before work.